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Reflecting Light

ReflectingLight

When I woke in early morning,

There he was on edge of bed,

Reflecting light, staring into space,

Lost within his thoughts.

Was he focused on what we did last night?

My eyes trace the shadows on his back,

Naked skin warm, inviting to my hand.

I love him most when he smells of sleep.

His hair a mess, dreams still possessed.

So I pause and watch,

Not wanting him to know I am awake,

Taking in his beauty without a sound.

I want to touch

Yet not disturb the quiet of the moment.

One word from me, one touch of hand—

Knowing he would turn and speak.

If I so much as stir,

Unconscious vulnerability would disappear,

So I lie upon the bed and do not move an inch,

Protect him while he’s unprotected…..

Nameless Bodies

Some say gay men have no need for love,

That pleasure is everything worth seeking.

Why open heart to pain and disappointment?

Better to penetrate and thrust into dark hole,

Oblivion finally found in flesh’s unrestrained receipt.

They seek to conquer bodies as though at war,

Count victory in higher number than the next.

One’s worth is found in larger inches of the sword,

Wounding, crying in the wind, then leaving

Nameless lovers as one buries bodies that are dead.

The ending is found deep within each beginning,

Present in the search, dark and narrow crevice

Opening, weeping alone into pillows every night—

Flowing pain so immense it spreads into the world

To others that one hunts to share the troubled aching.

I do not want a world only filled with unknown people.

There must be more found within

Lingering dreams of outstretched arms.

You can do this. You can find this, too.

The night is long and you are free to choose.

Within us burns one flame….

Protect that fire from wind that blows outside.

I wish for you what I hope for me—

Heart that is whole, joined from fragments—

So what do you want to do? How are you going to feel?

What kind of man are you going to be?

An hour, a day, a month away

Never since first meeting him

Had we ever been apart—

For forty days and forty nights

We came to cherish and to chart

Our wicked ways together….

And so in early morning

As I flew south

And he, in turn, flew west,

I missed his cheek and lips

Against my naked flesh.

Just as one single day can teach

The meaning of supreme,

Another is austere

Without his smile to gain—

He merely haunted as a ghost….

It seems he left so many days ago—

Did I forget to count?  Was it days or years?

Oh no, his lips turned bright red

When he told his little lies,

Then look my heart and always laughed.

And so it is this day—

How cruel does love contrive

To pierce our hearts with hope

We may find what we are seeking.—

An hour, a day, a month or more away.

Leave the Field Completely Open

 Field is Open

As you stand there naked,

There are no labels that apply,

No judgment, no analysis….

There is no category that fits—

As in up or down, top or bottom.

With you, I leave the field completely open,

Your unblemished skin cool to the touch,

Yet so warm it makes me boil inside.

How can I resist

When my very soul says “Yes”?

Even with heart vulnerable,

There is no fear, no defense,

No need to control you or myself.

I long to be yours,

As much as you belong to me—

Utterly free, being fully present,

Conquered only by open heart.

Deep into the Unknown

young boy

Dedicated to Vando

When I first saw him I wondered—

Was he too young for love?

If I opened my heart, would he run away?

He’s a Brazilian boy, eyes flecked with blue,

Skin the color of honey when it’s warmed in the Sun.

I’m not sure I have the words to describe his lips—

Round and full and sweet— not sure

If that describes his mouth or ass.

For hours, we lay naked as I fed him grapes.

His body smooth except for light fur on thighs,

Vulnerable as he lay upon silk sheets,

Heart and soul open, filled to rim with desire for me.

I could not hold back. Gave him all he wanted,

Thrusting deep where he’s tight and sweet.

Take me, my young boy…..

He seemed an answer to wordless prayer,

Our time together pregnant with love,

Tonight, tomorrow, and deeper into the unknown.

Tobacco Lips

smoking man
After you left, my bed still warm from your fire,
I found your cigarette,
Still smoldering in ashtray—
Ashes glowing, sending up thin signal,
So much heat we had shared…

I smile, hearing your sigh,
Seeing your face long after you left,
Thin grey wisp of smoke
Trembling as it rises upward in draft.
I’m still drunk, savoring tobacco lips…

Lying back in the dark,
I sigh into empty room.
You drove down the road long after midnight,
Around the bend of the curve—
Leaving me tasting last kiss.

Come Be My Love

Be My Love

Come storm my world….

I’ve had my fill of wind and rain,

Cold seasons shrieking thunderous woe.

Stand beside before beauty’s spent

Promise kisses and not my heart be rent.

We’ll find upon orbed Earth

Level place where arms encircle flesh,

Gaze deeply within the other’s eye

Tears of sorrow, tears of yearning love,

Careless hand exploring what’s below.

We’ll lay untucked by gentle creek,

Sleep bare upon floor of cave at night

Say goodbye to fears and greet the dawn

Together blessed by Heaven’s song,

Make love through shadows as new day begun.

Each day we’ll use a thousand wishes,

One by one throw them blessed into river,

Run swift in hours that swiftly fly,

Hold fast by brief to bear whatever flood

Comes by drops to dampen dust to mud.

Become my boy, my youth, my manly man

Give me cause to make this weeper laugh,

Subdue my tongue and hold in mind all questions deep.

Come night we’ll taste each other’s sweets,

Entwine our legs, desire our manly meat.

We’ll feast upon such living hearts

Red blood for passions as time imparts.

Take my eyes as opals as I see yours,

Colors swirling as falling leaves

Moaning voice swarms as buzzing bees.

Never will there be allowed hard pride in truth,

Hearts be soft and lips be tender kissed—

Together abide no cost more dear

Than wind of breath when sleep is near.

I pledge my soul to you, embraced by heart and hand.

Men-Heaven
So amazing are you
That I kiss the dust
Of the Earth your feet walk upon.

Before I knew you,
I thought I knew what I wanted.
After knowing you— only then
I experienced immediate union,
Such piercing of body and heart
That every thought was prayer
To be in your presence
And know always your Love.

Out of your presence,
I am incomplete, alone, lost—
Separate from true foundation.
But caught by your eyes,
I live in Deep Ocean of Rapture.

Here I am
Burning with fire— only desire,
Moaning the only music I hear.
Pluck me by noonlight;
Fuck me by moonlight.
I offer you my greatest sacrifice—
I offer you my self.

In middle of night,
Perhaps in a dream,
I heard a question asked by
Someone or something or you….
I answered, “Yes!”
Yes, I will kiss the dust of the Earth
Your feet walk upon.

Egyptian manFor Emad

Lying on the banks of the Nile
I gave myself to you,
Watched only by ancient gods and eternal stars.
Felt your breath upon bare skin,
Your hungry kisses up and down my naked body.

How could I resist?
Locked gates around my heart swung open
To Egypt’s enchanting ways—
Every limb, square inch, cell
Drenched, washed, blessed.

I tasted your dark honey,
Drank your sweet white milk—
What joy!  What fragile ecstasy….
Spark of divinity and essence of being
Wordlessly kissing my thighs
Until like the Red Sea before Moses—they parted.

Aroma of fervor as though smoldering incense,
Kissing and licking my feet—
Magic flooded into my soul.
Slowly you entered my inmost sanctuary,
Each inch a burning step of holy sacrifice—

You gave birth to such deep yearning in me,
Longing to be one with you in flesh…
With you above, behind, beside.
Now as rain falls on dark empty streets,
I am wet with memories and desire
To return to you and Egypt.

surrender

Last night, you woke me
Deep inside, my inner eyes
Opened, blinked awake,
Gave birth to a new sound.

You, as violinist, made of me
A Stradivarius, fingering
Chords upon my flesh,
My chamber vibrating, even
My thighs quivering as
You slowly plucked, sucked,
Fucked your way to
Resonant sound and deeper
Harmony as angels make
When held in the hands of God.

You, the musician, and I,
The instrument, became one
As I surrendered, was stretched
Beyond the limit of pain
And pleasure, knew
That deep inside
The dam was letting go,
That it was futile to resist the flood,
That your warmth was melting me,
Shaping me to your pleasure,
Crafting, composing a symphony
Of such tenderness that I opened,
Blossomed into song, echoed,
Cried, emptied myself,
Transformed by your expertise,
Your art, your patience, your
Very need of very need
Bringing me to my need
For you above, behind, within,
Until the crescendo passed,
And I fell, exhausted,
And still the music played on
In the silence of my sleep.